


Dreams

by JayceCarter



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awkward First Times, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Sharing a Bed, Sleepy Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-25
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-12-19 15:37:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11900784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayceCarter/pseuds/JayceCarter
Summary: Nora and MacCready have both been willing to pretend. She pretends she doesn't love him and he pretends he doesn't know. When he kisses her in the middle of the night, Nora thinks she might finally get what she's been waiting for, but it turns out their dreams aren't exactly the same.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for my slow work. I hurt my finger rock climbing. I think I dislocated it a little. I got it back into place, but I'm having trouble with it still, so I'm working a bit slowly. Hopefully it's better soon!

Nora woke to warm, chapped lips against hers, to fingers digging into her hip. She might have panicked if the kiss didn’t taste like whiskey and cigarettes and dust.

 

RJ.

 

Was this finally it? What she’d waited for, what she’d wanted from him? She hadn’t pushed him, wouldn’t push him. They both needed time to heal, to move on.

 

Her from Nate, him from Lucy. She'd healed faster, but RJ? He hung onto that pain, lived inside of it, and she'd let him have it. 

 

But his lips moved against hers so sweetly, like he was dying without the touch, like nothing mattered but this kiss, but her and him and the moment. It was the desperation she’d been waiting for, the heat she’d dreamed of, the need she’d wanted from him.

 

They’d slept beside each other night after night, since accommodations were hard to come by, but it was always platonic. At least, it was to him.  

 

Nora slid a hand beneath his shirt, stroking against his stomach. He was thin, the ridges of his ribs sticking out, but she savored the touch. How many times had she watched him in their travels? The times when they’d bathed in the river or changed by a campfire, and she had to pretend not to notice exactly how the light caught on his hip bones. She’d tried to pretend she didn’t feel that way, even when she’d lose herself in the sight, in the fantasy, in the dreams that took her at night.

 

RJ. Her RJ. The only person she had that she could trust in this whole new world, the only man who really understood her. He’d lost his wife, was fighting for his child. He was the other side of her.

 

He broke the kiss and pressed his lips to her jaw, down to her throat, his breath spilling over her skin.

 

Nora tilted her head back to give him access. “I’ve been waiting so long for this,” she whispered against the darkness of the room, so deep and thick she couldn’t see anything of him but an outline.

 

He mumbled, but she couldn’t understand him. She didn’t care when he pushed her shirt down to expose her breast and captured a nipple between his lips. His tongue rubbed against her and she slid her hand out of his shirt and into his hair, clutching him as if it all might slip away, like they might wake and he'd be gone again.

 

“I love you, RJ, so much. I have for a long time, but I was afraid you’d never feel that way about me, that you’d never want me, too.” She poured out her heart to him, all the things she’d shoved down inside of her, the things he wasn’t ready for, the things he’d made clear he didn’t want to hear. She couldn’t keep them silent, not when he pressed kisses against her, when he held her like nothing mattered more to him. This was what she’d hoped for, the stupid romantic notions that clouded her mind all these months.

 

Nora wrapped a leg around his thigh, wanting more, always more, trying to make up for the months she couldn’t have anything. She was starving and nothing could sate her but the man in front of her. 

 

He moved his lips back up to hers, rolling over her, hand sliding into her hair. He broke the kiss and whispered, voice quiet and mumbled, “I love you, Lucy.”

 

Nora shattered at his wife’s name, pushing at his shoulders because she couldn’t breathe right then. The name took the air in the room and snatched her fantasies away.

 

He rolled off her as he woke, shaking his head to clear it. “Nora?” All the confusion in his voice made her tremble. He didn't mean any of it. She'd just been a stand in for his dead wife, for the woman he loved, the woman she'd never be. 

 

She fixed her shirt and pulled away, giving him her back. “You were dreaming.”

 

His breath was heavy, and she knew what he saw, what he felt. His own erection, his speeding heart, there was no way to not guess what had been happening. “Oh, hell. I’m sorry, Nora. I didn’t do anything to you, did I? I’d never do that on purpose, you know that, right?”

 

She struggled to keep it together, to not let the wounds show even as he cut new ones into her. “Yeah, I know.”

 

His hand set on her arm, squeezing for a moment. “You’re my only friend, Nora. I didn’t mean to.”

 

“I know you didn’t. I’m going to go get some air.”

 

His fingers slipped off her as she stood, and he didn’t try to stop her, didn’t try to get her back. “Are you okay?”

 

She sniffed once. “Course, I am.” The lie slid out so easily while she shoved all those things she’d said back down, all the wants and dreams and stupid fantasies back into some tiny box inside of her so they could never escape again. They hurt too much, a parasite that ate her alive, bite by bite, until nothing remained but a shell. The hope would kill her.

 

Rj stood, grabbing her hand, and it made her want to cry for the loss of the stupid things that she’d thought, for just a moment, were possible.

 

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

 

She shook her head, willing to lie, knowing he was willing to believe the lie. It was the only way to move forward, for her to pretend she wasn’t desperately in love with him, and for him to pretend he didn’t know it, and fuck it all, because it hurt.

 

She smiled in the darkness. He wouldn’t see it, but she need it to hold back the tears and the screams and the pain. “No, RJ, you didn’t.”

 

He pulled her against his chest in a tight hug, and she pressed her face against his neck.

 

They both ignored the tears that soaked his shirt.

 

Sometimes pretending was easier, even when it killed you.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

RJ rubbed his fingers over the bridge of his nose as Nora traded with Arturo. She’d been strange all week, ever since that damned dream.

 

And as much as he tried to pretend it had meant nothing, he’d had trouble forgetting it.

 

He’d been back with Lucy while he slept, wrapped up with her in the nights when he’d come back from a job, when she’d put Duncan to bed and pulled him to their room. She’d always kissed him so softly, sighing against his lips. She'd moved slowly and sweetly and he'd never gotten enough. 

 

His Lucy had always been a gentle woman.

 

Nothing like Nora.

 

When he’d woken up, when he’d found her against him, the taste of her lips on his, grinding against her instead of Lucy, he’d panicked.

 

And she’d fled.

 

But ever since? He couldn’t stop thinking about her mouth, about the curves of her body.

 

How had he missed that over the past year? All that time following her, relying on her, together, and yet he’d never seen her that way. She’d been his boss, his friend, but never anything more. In the rare moment something else even dared to creep in, he'd shot it in the face before it ever had a chance to become a full idea.

 

Now, he saw something else. He couldn't help it, couldn't shake the images, the desires. Now, when she leaned over the counter, he noted the curve of her back, the way her vault suit cupped her ass, the way she was tall enough he could take her from that angle.

 

He shook his head.

 

No. She had a husband and he had a wife. They might be dead, but that didn’t mean they were gone, not really. Pursuing anything, trying anything, would be spitting on the memory of both their spouses.

 

He couldn’t do that. He needed to keep his head on straight and his dick in check.

 

The distance though? That hurt. Nora had turned into his solid place over their time together, and that place shook. She kept distance between them. Instead of sitting together and joking, she would pull away, go to bed early. Her words came out measured and soft, and she refused to look at him. He missed her eyes, the way the skin beside them would crinkle when she’d smile at him. He wanted that back, wanted the easy way they'd traveled, the way when she was really tired, she'd curl up against him and drift off to sleep while he read.

 

Hell, he even missed the way she'd drool on him in those moments.

 

Hurting her was the last thing he’d wanted, and yet that pain stood out in her face.

 

“Do you have anything to sell?”

 

RJ jerked his gaze up, Nora now in front of him. “No. Took care of it all with Myrna. She thinks I’m cute and gives me better prices.” He waited for her to make a joke, to tell him he wasn’t that cute, to punch him in the arm and say she followed him around because he was cute. Something. Anything.

 

She said none of that. “I’m gonna pick up some noodles. Want some?”

 

He stuck his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “Yeah, sure.”

 

Nora nodded. “I’ll meet you at home.”

 

He wanted to say something else, but she walked away from him, leaving him there alone. She drifted away from him, and he had no idea how to stop it. He wasn’t the sort to sit down and talk about his feelings, but losing her? Losing her felt like losing Lucy all over again.

 

All because of a stupid dream.

 

He couldn't lose her, but could he be brave enough to keep her?

 

#

 

Nora set the noodles down on the table, then brushed her hands on her pants where the broth had spilled onto her fingers.

 

RJ came down the stairs, his jacket gone, in just his pants and shirt. His hat hung on the hook by the door, hair brushed back away from his forehead. He always looked good casual like this, when he let his guard down and let that scowl fall from his lips.

 

“Thanks, boss.”

 

Nora yanked her gaze away from him. He’d made his opinion clear. He didn’t want her, not the way she wanted him. Leering at him was creepy and wrong when he didn’t love her, not the way she needed.

 

Sure, it wasn’t easy. She’d tried hard to not stare at him since that dream, tried to not make things uncomfortable. Losing their ‘maybe someday’ she’d created in her head hurt enough that she wasn’t sure how she’d survive losing his friendship as well.

 

And that way he smirked, with one side of his lips tilting up, the arrogant, angry way he looked at the world, they all called to her. She wanted to interlace her fingers with his, the long, agile fingers that stroked over the lines of his sniper rifle as he cleaned it.

 

He stood just behind her now, and she swallowed hard at the heat that poured off him.

 

“Talk to me.” His voice filled the entire place with that request.

 

“What’s the point?” So they were both cowards, too afraid to just say what was in their head. Instead they'd dance around this bullshit. Fuck, her feet were tired of this dance.

 

He set a hand on her shoulder and turned her until she faced him. He wasn’t much taller than her, but she kept her gaze down to avoid his eyes. “We can’t keep going like this. We need to figure it out.”

 

“There’s nothing to figure out, RJ. I want more and you don’t. I’ll get over it. I have to.”

 

His hand slid from her shoulder to cup the side of her neck. “What about your husband? I know he’s gone, but you still love him, don’t you?”

 

“Of course, I still love him. I always will. I’m not trying to replace him with you, you idiot. I just want something good in my life, and that’s you. You're the only good thing in my life anymore.”

 

His hand moved up to her cheek, catching tears with his thumb. “I still love Lucy.”

 

Nora shook her head and went to pull away. Of course he did. She didn’t blame him; she’d never live up to Lucy. The perfect wife who had given him a son, who had protected her son like Nora hadn’t done. Why was she trying to compete with someone she’d never win against?

 

RJ caught her behind the neck and pulled her back against him. “Wait. Just listen to me, would you? I still love Lucy, and what scares me is that by seeing you that way, by trying something more between us, it’s like spitting on her memory. I’m afraid it’s turning my back on her, on everything we had.”

 

“I understand.” She did, that was the worst part. It wasn’t like she hadn’t caught herself staring at him only to chastise herself for the thoughts, told herself that she owed it to Nate to go to her grave loving only him. Then RJ had snuck beneath those defenses at the stupidest of times, like when he picked up a rock and threw it at the Prydwen, yelling his first curse words she’d ever heard from him, despite the fact there was no way he’d have hit anything. Or when she found him huddling inside a rusted car frame because he hated the rain. Or when he’d gotten them into a bar fight because he was talking shit to a man twice his size.

 

Or the way he liked to yell ‘tunnel snakes rule’ whenever they were underground.

 

Those things had crept past all her defenses until she couldn’t deny that she loved him anymore. If only she could be enough for him to feel the same.

 

RJ grasped her chin, lifting her face to his. “I don’t think you do understand. I thought it was wrong to think about you like that, but I couldn’t help it, couldn’t stop it. After I woke up like we were, I freaked out, but I can’t stop seeing you that way. We’re two sides of the same coin, after all. If anyone understands how I feel, you do. I know Lucy wouldn’t want me to be alone, wouldn’t want me to lose you. In fact, if she were here, she’d have kicked my as- my butt for pushing you away.”

 

“What are you saying?”

 

He leaned in and brushed his lips across hers, so tentative it broke her heart. It wasn’t the kiss from the middle of the night, where he claimed her, all passion. That had been desperation and, as much as she hated it, that had been something they didn't have between them. This was a question, an experiment, this was him crawling out onto a branch to see if it would snap beneath them. “I’m saying I love you, Nora, and I want to try this.”

 

As much as it was everything Nora wanted to hear, she pushed back. “I don’t want you to do this because you’re afraid of losing me. This has to be something you want, something you really want, and not just something you’re forced into.”

 

He used both hands to hold her cheeks this time, his familiar scent of cigarettes and whiskey and dust spilling over her. “I want you. I’m sorry it took me this long to figure it out.”

 

And that was enough for her. Nora leaned in and returned the soft kiss, not wanting to push him too far, to make things move to fast. She had time; they had time.

 

Finally, they were going the right way.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. I am someone who caves to peer pressure. There will be one more chapter of this after this one, so we can have some smut to make up for punching any feels in the face.


	3. Chapter 3

 

The next two weeks passed, broken up by the same things their life had consisted of before. Taking jobs, earning caps, bullets. The only change were the sweet kisses they exchanged in the silence, in sitting closer than before, in the looks full of potential they’d smothered in the past.

 

But. . . that was all.

 

Neither had made a move, and even the kisses had tapered off, as if neither knew how to make the last leap. Instead, they wasted time in this holding pattern. 

 

They sat across from each other, a firepit roaring between them, throwing shadows against the walls of the shack they’d taken shelter in from the rad storm raging outside. RJ sat on the floor, Nora in a chair.

 

Nora took a bite of her food, trying to ignore the absurdity of the moment. No one alive knew her better than RJ, and she doubted anyone knew him better than she did, so why was there this awkwardness between them? They’d both admitted their feelings, both claimed to want more, but no one was willing to make the first move.

 

Stupid. What was she, fifteen again? Some virgin who wasn’t sure how to navigate her ass to second base?

 

Before she said anything, RJ picked up the whiskey and gulped two large swallows, then passed it to her, eyebrow cocked up to the line of his hat.

 

So, that was the game. They were going to get drunk enough to ignore their inhibitions.

 

She was fifteen again. Wonderful.

 

Still, Nora took the bottle, fingers brushing his, before tilting it and one-upping his two swallows with three. They passed the bottle back and forth until it was nearly empty. Neither spoke until they’d done a few rounds a piece.

 

“I really like your vault suit,” RJ said, breaking the ice, words drenching in whiskey. “It fits just right. . .” He cupped his hands together, holding them low.

 

Nora laughed and took another drink. “Must be what vault-tec was after with ‘em. I got an extra, we could get your skinny legs into it.”

 

“I’ll have you know I don’t have skinny legs. They are perfectly-“ he hiccuped “-proportional to my build.”

 

Nora stuck her foot out and kicked his knee. “They are skinny little chicken legs, proportional only if you are, in fact, a chicken.”

 

He caught her ankle, yanking it so she was knocked off her chair, her ass hitting the floor as she broke down into a laughing fit. “I’m not skinny. I am lean. See, lean.” He let go of her ankle to lift his shirt. “Lean means I’m quick and agile.” He pointed at the muscles visible beneath his skin.

 

Nora crawled closer to him, jabbing a finger into his side. “These are ribs. Ya know, back in the day, ribs were something girls were supposed to have. I mean, I guess we all have ‘em, but yours were supposed to show. You have any idea how many stupid diets I went on trying to get mine to show?”

 

“No wonder you all blew up the world; You were idiots. You don’t have to show your ribs to be fuc- damn- I mean, darn pretty.”

 

She shook her head, then pinched his side. “See, no fat, and I’ve seen you eat. You just wait, as soon as you turn thirty, you’re gonna put Skinny Malone to shame.”

 

RJ grabbed her and rolled them over, pinning her beneath him. “That’s not nice. Pretty sure I said you were pretty. Supposed to say thank you and say something nice about me.”

 

Nora knocked his hat off and ran her fingers through his hair. “Thank you, and you are pertty pretty, too.”

 

He leaned down to kiss her, all whiskey fumes and teeth. She spread her thighs around him, his hips taking up the space between, grinding against her.

 

The kiss was messy, their hands desperate. At least it washed away Nora’s fears he didn’t want her. This was the kiss of a man who really wanted someone, a man who’d waited too damned long.

 

She pulled at the button of his pants, fingers clumsy. He hissed when she caught his stomach with a nail, but she only swallowed the sound from his lips.

 

He braced his weight up on one hand as he reached between them, pulling down the zipper of her suit. Once it was half-way off, Nora let go of his pants and pulled her arms out of the sleeves, arching up to move it down.

 

This made her stomach flutter, the way he touched her, the way his hips thrust against her, the way he kissed her.

 

Wait, that wasn’t a flutter. It was more of a rolling.

 

Fuck.

 

Nora shoved his shoulder and managed to roll to her side enough to not choke as she threw up a good amount of the whiskey she’d drank and most of her pride.

 

#

 

RJ groaned at the light that stabbed into his eyes when he tried to open them. Fuck, mornings sucked. His mouth tasted like an old ash tray, at best. Residual whiskey hung there, and he might French a feral to wipe the taste out.

 

When was the last time he’d drank like this?

 

He sat up, hand pressed against his hand, before his gaze landed on the mostly naked woman laying in the bed beside him.

 

Nora. Her vault suit was pulled to her hips, leaving her chest bare. She laid on her stomach, one leg out to the side, hair pulled back and tied into a messy knot.

 

Right, she’d thrown up and he hadn’t wanted her to get it in her hair, then they'd stumbled into the bed and fallen asleep before any stupid ideas like round two crossed their mind.

 

Wait, it wouldn't even be round two since round one never happened. 

 

So much for their first time. He’d wanted. . . something. Something special, something they could think back on. He wanted fire and passion and an amazing start that they’d always have.

 

The drinking had happened for some liquid courage. Judging from the way she’d followed his lead, she’d needed it, too.

 

She just didn’t hold her whiskey as well as he did.

 

“Well fuck,” she muttered, voice cracking like her throat was Mojave Desert dry. “Guess I sorta screwed up last night, huh?”

 

“We both screwed up it, I think. I may not have spewed all over the floor, but I wasn’t exactly the picture of charm or seduction.”

 

She rolled over, crossing her arm over her chest to hide her breasts, red on her cheeks. “I’m sorry, RJ.”

 

“Yeah, me, too.” Even as he said it, he wanted to curse. Why couldn’t they figure this out? They both wanted the other, so what was the problem? Why couldn’t they just make things work? The fit together in every other way.

 

She laughed at his stupid jokes and never got mad at him when his attitude was shitty, and it was shitty a lot. They laid together on the floor, legs up against a wall, reading comic books until it grew dark, when Nora would flip on the light of her pipboy so they could keep going.

 

“What’s wrong with us, Nora?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

He stood up and walked to his pack, picking up a can of water and tossing another to her. “You know what I’m talking about. We make so much sense everywhere else, but we can’t figure this out. It’s the only place we just don’t mesh.”

 

The swish of Nora rinsing her mouth out met RJ as he tried to rid his mouth of the taste of the night before.

 

A spit, then Nora sighed. “I don’t know. I just feel like it’s taken us so long to get here, this should be easy. This should just be right.”

 

He turned back toward her after finishing off the water. “You’ve been my best friend, the only person who has had my back, who I trust. Shouldn’t be this hard to fuck you.” The curse worse slipped out and he said a silent apology to Duncan, but hell, sometimes there was no better word.

 

Nora’s lips tilted up. “I think it needs to be hard to manage that.”

 

The joke had him shaking his head. “I’m serious. We aren’t virgins here, so why are we acting like it?”

 

Nora brought her knees up and wrapped her arm around them, still hiding her chest. “Have you been with anyone since Lucy?”

 

“No.”

 

“I haven’t been with anyone since Nate, either. I think maybe we want so badly for it to be perfect, that we’re forgetting. . . we aren’t perfect. I mean, no one is, but you and I? We’re not even close.”

 

He knelt in front of her, setting his hands on her knees, still in her vault suit. “Feels like we need to get it right. This is important, Nora.”

 

“I know it is, but we’re both too cynical to believe that bullshit about perfection and sex. We need to let that go, to stop worrying about trying to be something we aren’t. You and I? We’re a disaster. I mean, it took us how long to even get here? You’re skinny and way too angry for how small you are, and I’ve got a terrible temper and have been known to punch super mutants and what part of that sets us up for stupid romance novel love scenes?”

 

RJ’s lip curled up. “I’m not skinny.”

 

“You really are, but you know what? I like it.”

 

He leaned in then, over her knees, to kiss her. His lips slid against hers, and instead of over thinking it, instead of trying to give her the best kiss, he just did what felt right. He just enjoyed her, the taste of her, the soft bite when her teeth raked over his bottom lip, the way the rough edges of her chapped lips brushed his lips.

 

Her knees fell open, and he took the invitation, moving between them, one hand reaching down to touch her chest. His fingers, callused from work and fighting, drug across her breast before closing around her nipple.

 

He used his thumb to toy with her nipple, rewarded by the way it stiffened. He closed his fingers around it in a tight pinch.

 

To which Nora yanked back and kneed him in the side. “That fucking hurts.”

 

“Too much, I got it. You could have just said so without bruising my kidneys.”

 

“You’re lucky that’s all I bruised.”

 

Their banter made him smile, that bond still there when he’d feared they might have broken it. He leaned in and drug his tongue over the nipple in apology before closing his lips around it.

 

Her fingers slid into his hair and gripped him. He risked raking his teeth over her, thankful she moaned this time instead of kneeing him again. He released her with a noisy pop, then grinned up at her. “Impressed yet?”

 

“Oh, you think you’re hot shit now?” Her fingers slid into the waist of his pants, still undone from the failed attempt the night before, and pushed them down over his narrow hips, along with his underwear. She pulled them down to his knees when he sat up to give her space, then drug her nails up the outsides of his thighs.

 

#

 

Nora might tease RJ about being thin, and he was far too arrogant as it was, so she’d never admit she loved his body. He didn’t have any fat on him, all lean lines and function. The dark hair on his thighs brushed against her hands as she moved up, over his legs, and to his hips. The bones of his hips stuck out, sharp like the rest of him, and Nora leaned in to kiss one side.

 

The groan he let out had her smiling. “Impressed yet?” she teased.

 

He leaned away from her to finish removing his pants, then gripped her vault suit, fingers sliding into the hips of her underwear as well. He didn’t pull it off, hesitating for a moment. “You’re sure?”

 

Nora captured his lips in a kiss as she lifted her hips so he could get the suit over her ass and down her thighs. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

 

He pulled when the suit got to her ankles, causing her to scoot down the bed an inch and laugh. He smirked before doing it again, almost falling backward when the damn thing slid over her feet. It left her in just her naked, and far too conscious of how she looked.

 

Nora wrapped one arm around her stomach, to hide the stretch marks there, the ones left behind from the child she never got to raise, and the large c-section scar. Normally they wouldn’t be so obvious, but she’d needed an emergency c-section and they’d been more worried about getting Shaun out than they’d been about a scar. She wanted to look perfect, to be perfect, even after she’d told him they weren’t close to perfect. His stomach, flat with that trail of hair the lead to places she’d purposely not looked yet, made her try to cover herself.

 

He wasn't Nate. She'd given Nate a child, so the scar meant something to him. She hadn't done that to RJ, so it was just an ugly scar.

 

But leave it to RJ to see through her bullshit.

 

He didn’t try to remove her arm, only scooted down, his legs outside of hers, until his lips were above her arm. He pressed kisses to the skin above and below her arm, his hands on her hips. “I’ve seen you covered in the most disgusting things imaginable. Remember when I had to help untangle the feral guts from your hair? You’re really going to be shy on me?”

 

“This is different.”

 

He bumped her arm with his cheek as he pressed a kiss to the skin just below that she hid. “Well, yeah. I wasn’t think these things at that time. Stretchmarks don’t bother me, Nora. And besides, the sooner you get over this, the sooner we get to the fun parts.”

 

She took a deep breath before pulling her arm away.

 

He didn’t move away, didn’t recoil from the scar. Instead, he pressed kisses along it, tongue teasing her skin. After a few moments, when his hand slipped between her thighs, she forgot what she had been so nervous about. His long fingers stroked over her slit in slow motions, like he was familiarizing himself, lips leaving her stomach so he could watch her face as he played.

 

When he finally slid his fingers into her, Nora lifted her hips. How had it been so damned long? Even when she played with herself, which she’d done plenty because widow or not, she had needs, she rarely finger fucked herself. It just was never the same, never felt the same as when someone else filled her. He pressed the two fingers into her, curling them up to rub just the right away.

 

Her head fell back, eyes closing at the sensation, and the promise of more.

 

His own groan had her eyes snapping open to find him stroking himself, though he paused when he caught her looking.

 

Nora stretched a leg out and hooked her heel around his hip, pulling him forward. “Come on, RJ, impress me already.”

 

He released a soft laugh as he pulled his finger from her and settled over her. “It’s well, it’s been a long time. I hope you aren’t expecting anything amazing here. I’m not going to last too long.”

 

“Nothing amazing, no. Just my 250 caps worth.”

 

His cock pressed against her, though he didn’t slide in yet. “I gave you those caps back already. Besides, you weren’t paying for this.”

 

The snarky response she had died in her throat when he moved his hips forward and pushed into her. Her fingers dug into his shoulders at the sting, the way he stretched her. Even as wet as she was, as much as she wanted this, it was a challenge. Seemed two hundred years without action took its toll.

 

His forehead pressed against hers. “You’re so fucking tight.”

 

“Language,” she scolded, smiling against his lips.

 

“I think I can make an exception. The new rule is that I can curse when you don’t have pants on.” He groaned as he pushed in deeper. “You doing okay?”

 

“Yeah. It’s been a while. Just, go slow.”

 

He nodded, nose bumping against hers, as he continued the slow entry. It took enough time that sweat covered his chest, some dripping onto her, before his pelvis pressed against hers. He kept his weight off her, but stayed close enough that his chest brushed hers with every deep breath.

 

Nora opened an eye to stare at him, his still closed. Lines of tension in his face said he wanted to move but was trying really damned hard to stay still and let her adjust. He had tiny scars on his face, and she knew he had more on his hands and arms. He hadn’t lived an easy life, hadn’t had a safe childhood and no safer a life as he’d grown up. He’d found something inside Lucy, some semblance of happiness that then was ripped away from him.

 

She moved a hand from his shoulder to his cheek, thumb brushing over his skin. She almost said something stupid and sappy, like she loved him or needed him or some bullshit like that which was for other people. Instead, when he opened his eyes, she grinned. “Okay, I admit it, I’m impressed.”

 

His breath spilled over her as he laughed before pulling back and thrusting in, a slow and shallow movement, just testing it out. Her leg wrapped over his hip, and he repeated the movement.

 

He didn’t last long, which she didn’t mind since it had been so long for her. When he got close, he slowed, hand gripping her hip tight enough she might bruise. At the last minute, he pulled out, coming between them, on her stomach, a few splashes over her cunt. He panted, face pressed against her throat, sweat causing his hair to stick to his forehead.

 

Finally, he rolled off her and grabbed a rag, handing it to her. “Was that. . .”

 

Nora laughed at the uncertainty in his voice as she cleaned herself off. She tossed the rag away before rolling toward him, throwing her arm across his chest, her head on his shoulder. “Well, I think it was worth those 250 caps.”

 

“I told you, I gave those back already.”

 

“Then why do you stick around?”

 

“Because no one else in the Commonwealth is stupid enough to travel with me.”

 

Nora smiled and curled in closer to him, answering what he hadn't said. “I love you too, RJ.”

 

He kissed the top of her head but said nothing back, and Nora tightened her arm around him.

 

They were a mess; A widow and a widower, both angry, temper-challenged smart asses with trust issues wider than Strong’s shoulders.

 

Still, even with as much of a disaster as they were, Nora couldn’t imagine anyone a more perfect match for her.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE. A happy ending for these two assholes. lol, and some awkward smut for you all. :)


End file.
